How To Destroy Your Enemy


Am I not destroying my enemies when I make friends of them? – Abe Lincoln

How To Destroy Your Enemies

1. You could dig up dirt on them and leak it to the public
2. You could study them to determine their weaknesses and chip away at them until they break under the pressure
3. You could study them to determine what/who they love and cut them off from it/them
4. You could gather data to prove that they are wrong about something and discredit them
5. You could bear false witness against them, thereby inviting the unjustified wrath of others
6. You could harm them in some way and render them useless
7. Or you could enter into a conversation with them to find out what you have in common and take it from there…

Often when disagreements surface, we feel we must clobber down those whom we perceive to be working against us and their ideas.

We’re afraid if we don’t, we won’t get our way.

We want to win.

If we really want to win, we should start where we agree and work forward from there. We’ll likely find that the end result is better than either side could have imagined alone. Who could you reach out to today to begin discovering which values you have in common?

The purpose of this blog is to facilitate discussions that will help us all to better engage with our communities. Your participation and feedback are most welcomed and valued. Please join the discussion below.



  1. Wyrd Smythe

    I wish I had a lot of money and/or fame. I’d love to create a panel discussion show where people from opposing sides of an issue spend as much time as necessary finding out where they have common ground and in identifying precisely the points of disagreement.

    And then maybe focusing on those with a goal of reasonable compromise.

    Currently all such shows tend to thrive on conflict, and it’s really the last thing we need these days.

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